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ALWAYS SOMETHING NEW

i'll begin with a brief warning; i feel like a lot has happened in the past two days, and i appreciate that i have the tendency to ramble. if you fear towers of text then you'd best shy away from what will likely be a gargantuan post. and i have no pictures unfortunately... for some reason pulling out my camera hasn't occured to me.

i'm nearing the end of my third day here in san jose, where i've been attending the many events that form to combine voltr.... err, the game developers conference. and now, the stories shall unfold.

BEFORE ICO

four years before the release of my... yes, my favorite game of all time, (i really do hate to single out one title, but...) fumito ueda had an idea. a concept. he saw ICO.... it was in his mind. then he made it, and i was happy.

when i was asked what i'd be covering at the show this week, i went back to check out a gdc schedule packet that i had received last month. i had then marked off a few events i wanted to attend. unfortunately, the old packet didn't have times listed for any of the events which led to my having to scour the website. it was then that i saw it: game design methods of ico. you know i had to be there. and thus, it was so.

it was amazing to finally lay eyes on the man who had shown me such beauty... such grace... such uncomprosiming vision. he had shown me something i never thought i'd ever see in a video game. and there he sat, ready to speak a bit about how he made my favorite game of all time... and i was there. bliss.

most excitingly, ueda-san showed a number of videos showing off ico in different states of completion: the original, pre-rendered lightwave pilot video, (crafted by ueda, himself) two showing the game running on ps1, and three showing early ps2 builds of the game. we weren't allowed to record any video or audio, unfortunately. it was amazing to see that in some ways, the final product has come a long way from what it began as... but yet, even the original pilot -- which had humanoid enemies, town environments outside the castle, and rather ugly character design -- still felt like ico. the man even claimed that properly animating fingertips was one of the most important aspects of creating the emotional realism that is so core to the game. seriously, isn't it? the man is a genius... someone knew to let him work for four years on ico... as far as i'm concerned, he can have as long as he wants for the next project.

if you'd like to read a slightly more coherent telling of what went down at the event, read this. oh and if you haven't played ico, just go do it. if you're not a gamer, go buy a used playstation 2 and a copy of the game... seriously. it's art.

GAME DEVELOPER'S CHOICE AWARDS

earlier this month, we hit the dice summit and the aias interactive achievement awards. dice rocked. the awards were laughable and unorganized. prince of persia won everything, (except game of the year, which was awarded to call of duty, to everybody's surprise.) even in categories where it clearly shouldn't have.

so my expectations for the game developer's choice awards were grim, to say the least. but i have to admit, the show was fantastic. jennie -- who i've spent much of my time with here at gdc... thanks for keeping me company kid... so, jennie decided that we should sneak right up to the front to take photos of the presenters and winners. as such, we had an excellent view. what set these awards apart? well, the production was actually good. everything was organized, there was only one audio foul-up... will wright's mic was turned off while he spoke for about five seconds. there was no pointless filler. the awards were the spotlight, and that alone was enjoyable. the only distraction -- and it was positive as the audience dug it -- was a showing of the sb email entitled video games. even though i'd seen it several times already, it was much more hilarious on a big screen with a crowd of people responding to it. that "your head a splode" gag is pretty priceless.

also, the awards, nominees, and winners were all quite suitable. i never really felt offended by any of the choices. and they gave great achievement awards to great people and products. the innovation awards, given out first, went to eyetoy: play, viewtiful joe, and warioware. that is so excellent. best new character to hk-47. game of the year to kotor. excellence in visuals to wind waker. sure, beyond good and evil got snubbed, but at least it was nominated in the appropriate categories. so kudos to those that make this event happen. it's the best awards show i've ever witnessed.

PSP IN-GAME FOOTAGE

at the sony keynote held earlier today, showgoers were shown the first in-game psp footage created to run on the emulators developers are currently using to make games for the future handheld. death jr., the game in question, is a little platformer of some kind, though it was hard to tell much about the game from the video. really, what's important though, we're the graphics. chris charla, one of the developers working on death jr., sucked off the psp for about five minutes before showing the footage. "polygon per polygon more powerful than the ps2," he claimed. i can't speak to the full power of the machine, but i can say that death jr. looked exactly as i imagined psp titles would look: better than ps1, not as good as ps2. the level architecture seemed very low-poly and the textures were smoother than what you'd see in a ps1 game, but still not as detailed as anything on current generation consoles. the particle effects, however, were quite impressive... they basically looked as if they were ps2 quality. the framerate was also smooth... like, umm... polished marble? a wet bar of soap, maybe? i'm tired of butter, what can i say...

what does this mean? i think future psp games are going to look fantastic. even though what we saw today wasn't ps2 quality, it was much closer to current generation graphics than ever before seen on a handheld. that's another thing... we saw the game on a giant projection screen. it will no doubt look much better when displayed in the proper size on the psp itself. so, yeah...the psp is still the next big thing in gaming, says i. i can't wait for my wireless, multiplayer soul calibur.. i mean, really... can you?

I SAW FABLE AND JADE EMPIRE...

...and both games are looking very, very, very, very sweet. goty contenders, for sure.

JANE

yesterday, when i was walking into the awards show, i happened to notice jane standing in the lobby. i quickly retreated into the actual convention hall with jennie, and mentioned to her that i was a fan. she told me to go talk to her, to which i first refused. i then changed my mind... but when i returned to the place where she had been, she was gone. a sign, i presumed. and it was better that way... i feared my tendency to turn all fanboy would be rather embarrassing... that combined with my general nervousness around woman would likely have been a devastating combo attack of sheer nerdiness and dorkosity.

then, at the sony keynote earlier today, jennie, ben, and i opted to sit on the balcony in order to give ourselves a good view of the show. it also gave me, unexpectedly, a good view of the crowd. out of the corner of my eye -- i promise i wasn't scanning -- i happened to notice jane sitting down directly below us. i again, for whatever reason, mentioned this to jennie, who noticed that, yes, jane is asian. this fact, combined with that fact that she runs a slick gaming site, plays in a tremendously wicked band, and lives in the bay area made her fair game for an interview in jennie's publication, asian week. she decided to make a move, and wanted to take my business card, as well. i can't be sure whether she was more motivated to get the interview or help a boy meet someone who he otherwise would not have... but regardless, she approached jane...

yes jane, who was in no time standing right in front of me. after an introduction and a few short words, i had to run off to an event, but jennie informed me later that i should meet the two of them, when the interview would take place.

we found a nice little spot on the floor to sit and we just started talking... sure, the interview kind of framed the conversation, but really we just chatted for a bit about games, journalism, her experiences as a female working in our industry, music, movies, fashion, and her plans for the future. i was very interested to hear that many of the things she's planning, are things that i think are missing right now from gaming journalism... things i will actively try to help create. in fact, many of her ideas mimick my own, although she's quite intelligent and would clearly be able to craft -- well, her text is superior, at least -- a much more eloquent product than i. i always hoped that someday i'd have a project far enough along to ask her for a bit of assistance and collaboration... but jane has quite a few things of her own planned... magazines, item crafting, and more of that lovely text that made me recognize her in the first place.

i have to confess, i was a bit embarrassed at first... physically, i'm not very happy with my appearance. my hair is currently rather atrocious and something possessed me to shave, making look very young. i was also forced to wear a disgusting gamespy polo shirt... alone it's really not very hip-looking by any means... but the way the shirt bunches up when i have three bags strapped to my back makes it even more unsavory. "whatever," i thought.. "nothing can be done..." and i just decided to have a good time. i had made it a point to properly introduce myself to jane at some point in the future... now that's out of the way. and with any luck, we'll be seeing more of her around. thanks jennie, it really meant a lot. and jane, if you somehow find this little site, know that it was quite nice to meet you finally.

whew... i think that's all i've got for now. i'm tired, it's very late, and i have to wake up early to write a few more stories before hitting the show again. i fly back tomorrow evening... then the packing begins again. we're moving to san francisco this weekend. it's all starting. and i'm ready for it.

and i know i've done so already, but i'm gonna thank jennie one more time for making this trip pleasant so far... it would have otherwise been rather sucky... except for ico, jade, fable, the awards, and the whole jane thing... i'm conflicted, i know.

THE NEW

the apartment has been located. it's nearly time to say farewell to the oc again... i suppose the only difference is that this time i'm really looking forward to it. this is not entirely due to the fact that our new place is so sharp... but it's most of it.

in the past week or so i've seen a bunch of friends: oli, ricky, shane. but my time in socal is quickly ccoming to a close and there are many other peeps i'd like to see before i gone. the sd crew. alex, chris, song, & nick. dawn. i'm spending this evening packing... my room needs to be placed in cardboard boxes and i'm traveling to GDC tomorrow on the 9am flight. i'll return friday evening, and continue packing... we're loading the truck on saturday and driving up early sunday morning. i'll be in and out of oc for the next two weeks, so hopefully i'll see all of you... if not, i'll be back around soon enough. or hey... come visit us in SF! we'll have plenty of room.

WRESTLEMANIA... ROCKS?

it does... i'll field responses to this statement on a case by case basis. but yes, it was quite fulfilling.

"NEW YORK CITY, I LOVE YOU"

the boys and i went out adventuring in the city again today. it was nice to finally leave the area immediately surrounding times square. this time, we hit a little cafe near nyu for a bite before stopping in washington square park. while there, we caught an act by a trio of street performers -- tick, tack, and the puerto rican kid -- who were not only quite hilarious, but were also able to cold-rock the break dance. it was quite entertaining. we don't see anything like that in orange county.

then raymond and i walked around the streets immediately surrounding nyu. the area is so beautiful... i've never even considered graduate school before, but damn.. it would be so amazing to go to film school there. options, options...

we shopped a bit as well. i picked up the yeah yeah yeahs record from tower. though i don't have television at home, i've been travelling quite a bit, and for some reason i end up watching more mtv than i'd care to admit. i'd seen the "maps" video a few times, and for some reason, it always intrigued me. i'm currently listening to the record, and it's not disappointing, actually. and for 8.99, it wouldn't have been much of a loss anyway. we also hit a few clothing stores... i probably would have picked up a few things; for example, a goddamn sweater would be nice. the windchill here is absolutely ridiculous. raymond scored a pretty nice leather wristband for ten bills.

he then suggested that we check out kim's video, a fantastic little store that had a bootlegged dvd featuring "the office" christmas specials... i almost picked it up, but it looked a little bit too ghetto; some dudes were selling bootlegs in the subway as well ("kill bill" and the jesus movie were among the mix) but back to kim's... they had a ton of great stuff. i saw a used copy of "viva l'amour" for less than ten bucks. "the hole" was like fifteen -- i almost replaced my missing copy. i did pick up tsai ming liang's "rebels of the neon god" -- a film i've been meaning to pick up for some time. in addition, i grabbed a crazy takashi miike import titled "the bird people in china"... i'd never heard of it before, but the artwork looked sweet. it seems the imdb peeps enjoy it, so hopefully i did well.

finally, we ran into a small videogame store, and boy... it made me really realize what a sore state the california scene is in. i walked in the door and was greeted by their used console selection... they had everything. i'm not even gonna start listing things off. if you wanted it, it was there. i'm not saying the store was cheap. it really wasn't. but the selection was fantastic. it was as if i had walked through a portal and ended up in akihabara. i had already spent so much money on media that i evacuated as quickly as possible.

but between kim's, this game store, and the beauty of the nyu area, i decided that i simply have to move to nyc sometime in my young life. soon. so sure, sf for awhile. but i need to get back out to this place. soon. it's incredible. did i mention the women? no? i absolutely adore their style. lovely.

i've got one more thing to mention: see "morvern callar" if you get the chance. it's directed by lynne ramsay who's also responsible for "ratcatcher". both films are expertly shot and the former has a pretty nice little soundtrack as well. there's a boards of canada track playing atop the dvd's menu. what more can you ask for. i couldn't help but think that the film looked as if dawn had shot it... that's a good thing obviously. anyways, yeah check it out if you get the chance.

tomorrow is wrestlemania. whoopie. until next time...

SANDWICH, REDEFINED

yesterday raymond, gibson, and i began adventuring around the times square area. after leaving the hotel, our fist stop was the world famous carnegie deli. raymond had been talking the place up for weeks... "the best reuben sandwich in the world," he claimed. i decided it was in my best interest to put his word to the test. and though i'd been warned, nothing could prepare me for what the waiter set down in front of me. the photos provide a better description than i ever could... but really, we're talking about a mound of meat here -- corned beef to be exact. the giant pile sits atop two pieces of rye, but you'll never see them. the whole mess is covered with melted cheese... and god, does it ever look disgusting. completely vile. but goddamn... that sucker is good. very good. the sandwich could feed three to four, in my estimation. actually, i don't care what the menu says... that's not a sandwich. i did my best but could only get about halfway through it. raymond, though, bested it with grace. i was impressed. they cost twenty dollars each... whew.

following the feast, raymond headed back to the hotel while jon and i hit a few stores. two dudes were hocking some independant hip hop in front of virgin... five bucks a disc. i decided to give both of them some business. cdrs, of course. hopefully later i'll be able to give you a review of crook factory's "hottest mixtape shit" and black gemz' "kings of da underground."

additionally, we took excessive amounts of photos around the times square area. unfortunately, gibson's camera is far superior to mine, so you get to see the crappier batch of shots -- 8 megapixel sonys are pretty sweet... anyways, take a look: last night, we filmed thq's wwe superstar challenge. basically, it involved a bunch of wrestlers arriving at planet hollywood to compete in a tournament... not a wrestling tournament. nope, they just played against each other in a wrestling videogame. that part of the event was pretty boring... but we did get to interview a bunch of the guys (and gals) and they were pretty interesting. we also shot the second episode of spycam. (if you haven't checked out the first one, hit this page now.) i also pumped up a large crowd of folks by simply pointing a camera at them... it was cool. anyways, the work must continue... the ny adventures will commence later today... so head back for more soon.

NYC

"new york cares..."

does it? all i know is that it's loud, brightly lit, and it's all happening right outside my hotel room's window. i'm currently stationed at the w, located in times square... and i won't be leaving my post until monday.

actually, that's not entirely true. i'm very excited about this trip. it's been years since i've visited nyc, and in addition, this is my first trip here without my family. more importantly, this is raymond's old stomping ground, so he's taken it upon himself to show gibson (jon... freelancer extraordinaire) and i the ropes. we just flew in this evening and already i've had a real taste of the city. we three wandered 'round times square and filled up on street dogs (sauerkraut and onions only... it's the natural ideal style of eating wiener) and pizza... and i have since remembered why i don't eat new york style pizza or hot dogs on my home turf. there's no comparison.

this place is really magnificent. and while everybody else has done it to death, i plan to shoot the hell outta nyc. i've got video and still photo cameras at the ready. "why?" you may ask. because it's my turn now, that's why! so expect footage and images soon.

for now, you'll have to deal with a few pics i took inside my hotel room. this is by far the most excellent looking -- and stupidly modern -- room i've ever stayed in. and it overlooks times square, for caviezel's sake! the most exciting elements are the shower without a door -- it simply has one piece of glass blocking water and a huge open area where it appears liquid will escape into the bathroom -- and the illuminated, glass, bedside tables. take a look: more from the apple tomorrow. check back...

ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND OST

i haven't really been following production on the film... though, it's directed by one of my favorite music video directors of all time... it has quite a cast... and it's written by charlie kaufman, which should make it at least somewhat entertaining. i guess i should've been paying more attention.

it has recently come to my attention that jon brion has scored the film. it's instantly much more interesting to me. i got the info via an automated, beck-related e-mail. you see, he's sings over one of jon's tracks on the record. it also pointed me to this site which contains the entire tracklisting of the disc and a clip of their song... this will be available march 16th. i imagine it'll be worth the cost. you may want to consider picking it -- or jon's earlier work -- up when it becomes available.

A DREAM

i feel great.

someday soon i'll tell you why...

TAKAGI MASAKATSU IS DOPE.

shane, carlos, ryan, and i took a trip to LA last night to check out a gallery opening... rather, it was a a/v performance by takagi masakatsu, a gentleman who releases records on w+k tokyolab... the label for which shane has been slaving away. the website may one day actually be complete. if so, you'll hear about it here.

the show was pretty incredible. he had the majority of a given track programmed up on his powerbook, then he played along on his synth. the video presentations were pretty beautiful, most featuring simple animated line art and low-res video of children, ususally in close-up. of course, this video was highly processed, and usually very colorful. but yeah, it was amazing. i'd tell you to purchase the records, but anyone without access to the tower in shibuya might have difficulty doing so.

...actually, i just checked the boy's website again and it appears that the store is fully functional... happy ordering.

we were supposed to visit with oli last night, but she didn't end up making it. it's probably better that way as i was having trouble fabricating excuses explaining why i had forgotten her copy of juliet of the spirits. who knows when she'll get it back now... oh well, she owes me a copy of the hole... we did end up meeting with daniel and a few of his friends... and hitting a defunct party hosted by shane's homies caleb and brandi. but the night was relatively quiet, nonetheless.

and now, i present to you a small fraction (sad, huh?) of the photos that were taken during my last two trips to vegas. i especially enjoy the one showing the latest entry in ray's phone. enjoy.

AN UPDATE FROM THE SHOW FLOOR

i'm here at DICE writing from the press room -- which has been surprisingly empty and is generously filled with 20" imacs... i want one -- after yesterday's trauma at work, i decided to get a little wild last evening. the reception party was held at the ghost bar, a swanky joint that sits atop the palms casino/hotel. it's known for its balcony which includes one smallish section of the floor made of plexiglass. so, basically you can stand out on this thing, and look straight down at the ground from fifty stories up. initially, i was ridiculously scared. but after about four drinks, several of us were hopping repeated on the thing to test its endurance. if you gotta go, man... would that ever be the way.

there, we met the usual assortment of press types. both billy and andy were in attendance, in addition to sam who'd i'd never met before last night. he's cool. cliffy, raymond, and sal completed our little crew and we had a blast just getting more and more loaded and cracking wise with some dudes from variety magazine. billy also introduced me to denis dyack from silicon knights... we talked a bit about metal gear and hockey. he's super nice. even invited us out to canada around e3. set that up, man!

after awhile, it was time to switch parties... the second one was held in a suite at the palms that was apparently home to several "real-worlders" during some season of the show that i never knew existed. the apartment was lush, as expected, and filled with the gaming industries coolest people. dr. greg was sporting a wicked new goatee -- raymond dubbed him "evil greg." i think it's a good look for him. when we asked dr. ray if any new facial hair was in his future, he told us that he needed to remain "good ray." yin & yang, see...

we kept getting more and more drunk... eventually it looked like a trip back to the "crazy horse too" was approaching. raymond led a crew of fine young gentleman there, and i ducked out unnoticed before being dragged along. it sounds as if fun was had by all... and raymond, well... umm... he may have done something a little silly. but it's too early to tell exactly what happened. more evidence willl be necessary. i'll keep you posted. maybe.

i took many, many photos at the "real world" party. i'll get them posted here as soon as i grab them from raymond's camera. should be interesting. more on the show -- and the gallery -- soon. stay tuned.

I WORK FOR IGN

the merger closed at 8:32 AM today, making me an official employee of ign entertainment. i've spent the morning crying at my desk. i'm surprised at how affected i've been. i was reading an e-mail that chris buechler -- a long-time gamespy who had been working off-site since i began -- had written proclaiming today his last day with the company. it did me in. our founder is leaving. carlos is gone. gamespy is over. and i now work for ign. it usually takes so much more... but this time i couldn't handle it. the tears came and i had to pretend that i was fine so my cubemate wouldn't notice.

in reality, i'm sure my current status is a product of a combination of a ton of things that have hit me in the past four days... needless to say, i'm not fine. everything is not okay. there's stuff that needs working out... and yet, i have to go to las vegas to work... to prove that i'm capable of performing my job. they're testing me. and i have to perform. how am i supposed to shoot if i can't see?

i should have provided an update on my previous las vegas trip, but i figure a general vegas update will do.... look for that soon. and pictures... i've got more. until then, keep your chin up, so i don't have to.

A LOBOTOMY, PLEASE.

...i'm tired of thinking.

a real update forthcoming... when i can stand my writing.